Just a cute picture of Eliza that has nothing to do with this post |
Once we were told to go to the hospital Thursday night we had Lance (Shawn's brother) come over to stay with Eliza (first blessing, family nearby!) As soon as he got there he and Shawn gave me a Priesthood Blessing and immediately my worry went away and I was overwhelmed with peace. I was told in the blessing that we would receive the best possible outcome, that everything would be OK. Of course in my head I was hoping that meant my water hadn't ruptured and something else happened.
I felt that peace throughout Thursday night and Friday. And really we have been incredibly blessed by this situation. It is true that we are having the best possible scenario given the circumstances. I am not contracting, the babies look good, and my cervix is closed. I don't have an infection, and we are all healthy.
One huge concern I had was that my parents were at the family cabin and didn't plan on getting home until Saturday. And there's no cell coverage at the cabin. I texted them as soon as we found out what was going on, and then called them again the next morning, knowing that it would be hours to days before they got the messages. I just kept praying that they would need to get to a place with cell phone service for some reason. I called and texted my siblings (usually my Mom's job) and let them know what was going on and also that Mom and Dad were at the cabin. My brother immediately responded and said he'd go get Mom and Dad. My sister responded and just said she was on her way to the hospital
. My other sister said she'd stay at our house with Eliza that night and also take Scooter for several days. Amazing. My family jumped in just how I needed them.
And of course Shawn's family has been helpful too from Lance coming over Thursday night, to Dena getting us transferred to her OB practice in the middle of the night and also just being a reassuring presence who understands exactly what's going on. Shawn's family is spread around more but each of them have been in touch and his parents are coming to take care of Eliza as much as we need.
Ward members mowed our lawn, we have more offers to take care of Eliza than we can utilize, and I can very much feel the prayers being said on our behalf. One small blessing that is very personal to me, one night I was in so much pain from the IV, just really suffering and feeling like every drip of antibiotic was a knife slicing through my hand. I was crying and I knew that nothing could take away the pain. I prayed and prayed for help. And then I thought of my babies and how I was going through this for them, and how if this really minimal pain would keep them safe longer I was completely willing to do it, and before long the pain disappeared and I was fine. I am grateful for that experience.
I have a testimony that there is a God, a kind, loving Heavenly Father who knows me as a daughter, an individual. He knows my fears, my wants, and my needs. He knows my baby girls better than I know them. I know that there is a purpose to this time and I may not get to understand it yet, but I have faith that there is a reason for all of this. I feel His love as I lay here in the hospital. I know He is also watching out for my Shawn and my Eliza. I am not alone in this. The misery and pain and lonliness is not just felt by me, but is felt by my little family, and that makes me want to be brave for them. We will all get through this time. We will come out stronger on the other end.
Thank you. That was great.
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