It's been one of those weeks and it's only Tuesday. Yesterday was one of those days that when I got home from work I told Shawn that I just wanted to cry. He looked at me and said "Go ahead and cry" but he face looked more like "Please don't cry, I won't know what to do if you cry!" Today was one of those days that I said to Laura, let's just run away. She asked where I wanted to go and I said, I don't care, anywhere but here. I'd be satisfied with Park City or Logan. (They are other cities in the state, I don't think that really classifies as running away.) Ugh. I feel so overwhelmed at work, so behind. And the behindness is overwhelming the overwhelming feeling. And last week I had a week that was a perfect catch up week. Until three urgent project got dropped on my desk, and then one of the behind projects came to a head, and I didn't get anything else done. So, this week I'm even MORE behind, more guilt for being behind and I just want to stop and run away. I just want to ignore all the behind projects and start completely fresh.
So, I stopped today and yesterday. I surveyed my office and got that overwhelmed feeling, but I decided to meet it head on. Instead of plopping non-urgent tasks and random papers in piles around my office I confronted those piles. I went through all of those papers and I threw most of them in the recycling bin. I organized the others and I cleaned off my desk. And I started to feel a sense of ease. A sense that I can indeed get caught up. And tonight before I left work I sat down with my "to do" stack and I went through every item, and I created a To Do List. And for the first time in weeks I feel like all that work is manageable. I can do it. And what's more, I'm kind of excited to do it. I love to do lists, I love crossing off items. Even though it's already been a long week I'm kind of looking forward to tomorrow and walking into my clean, organized office with my to do list.